i am moving my blog because tblog's templates now stink. i can't figure out how to customize this anymore, so here's the new link: hollyboo.blogspot.com woo-- i actually blogged -boo

suggestions suggest that i should move the locale of the party:

Don Pablos it is!

ps. check out the link in my post below and tell me what you think. i thought it was hillarious!

Hey all,

I'm thinking about having a party to celebrate my birthday, my graduation, and my completion of student teaching.

Date: Sunday, December 11, 2005
Time: 6:00 pm.
Place: Buffalo Wild Wings in Defiance, Ohio

After food we would go see "Narnia."

RSVP ASAP-- if I get enough people, party is on. If no one wants to come and show their love and support, then party is off:)

Wanna come? Have friends that want to come? Let me know via email or leave a message on this blog.

-boo

The party will be about as fun as watching this video and sharing your thoughts on a reporter's agony:)

Click the link below for some fun:

http://www.incredibleeagle.com/content/videos/Atlant a" title="http://www.incredibleeagle.com/content/videos/Atlant a" target="_blank"http://www.incredibleeagle.co...%20Grape%20Stomping.mov

The world knows about Sufjan now-- he made MTV News. My sister told me as soon as I got home that Sufjan graced his face on MTV this afternoon. You can check it out at this link:

http://www.mtv.com/news/yhif/sufjan_stev ens/" title="http://www.mtv.com/news/yhif/sufjan_stev ens/" target="_blank"http://www.mtv.com/news/yhif/...

You have to use a PC and Internet Explorer to use the MTV movie player thingy.

They had a link to buy his music on iTunes-- I was surprised at this as well because the last time I checked he wasn't even on there.

So the word's out.

-boo

I am so sick of looking at my own un-updated blog, so I thought that I would write a little sumthn' sumthin'.

Lately, I haven't been up to anything too interesting. This last weekend I went to Cedar Point with my family. We camped there on Thursday night, went to the park on Friday, and then camped another night. I loved MaxAir-- highly recommended.

I have been watching a lot of movies lately and reading a lot of books. It feels good to chose what I am consuming rather than having to just read classwork.

Well, right now I am watching Space Camp. It was one of my favorite movies as a kid and I haven't watched it since I was 10 or something. Oh, this is so good.

Do you know Joaquin Phoenix? This was his very first movie.

I also have watched American Splendor (good), and I watched the first half of Spirted Away (okay, so far). I visited my grandma yesterday and got glued to the Judy Garland marathon and ended up watching Easter Parade and Meet Me In Saint Louis:) Good stuff, I know.

I just finished reading To Kill a Mockingbird. I am supposed to teach it next fall and so I decided to reread it. I hadn't read it since third grade. I had forgotten most of the story. I really enjoyed it this time around. Previously I thought the story was just about racism, but there are much deeper issues that I think are overlooked when people talk about the book/movie.

I also read Harry Potter. I loved it as much as I loved the others. Sure, there are the sad parts and the typical parts-- but HP is just good.

I am reading The Gnostic Gospels by Elanie Pagels right now. I have read parts of that book for IMPACT stuff before, but I have never read the book all the way through. She is writing about the gospels that were left out of our current Bible and why they were left out. So far, all she has established is that there are found gospels written around the same period, or even a little before the orthodox ones were written. When I read the rest of the book, I will have to tell you what they're about.

Well, this sure was a boring post. That is what I get for trying to post when I am watching SpaceCamp--woo hoo!

-boo

i loved the movie! i saw it twice this weekend. holding off on HP because i have to read a book for an IMPACT discussion this weekend. HP will be next week!!

tess, you are so right about johnny depp.



"yippee!"

-boo

Whoa, sadness... why does it rear its ugly head around all of us. Many of us are asking, "what is the meaning of this sadness, loneliness, etc."?

I have had the suckyiest of weeks-- I don't think my verbal skills are skilllicious enough to describe the greasy holes, oil dripping furnaces, and oil soaked clothes I have had to endure the past two weeks (The "chokey" in Matilda best describes the place I work and the holes I have had to clean the last week and a half for the factory's shut down). Today, alone, I went through a uniform, a pair of socks, and a pair of shoelaces because an oil pump backfired all over me.

As the oil slowly leaked down my neck, my very expensive girl underroos, and down my socks, and into my boots, all I could think of is, "Why God... why do people have to live this life every day? How do they go on?"

God is probably so sick of hearing that question from me lately. I ask it everytime I hear, see, or experience sadness in my life. And his answer has always been simple throughout-- "Don't you see the contrast, Holly? God = good, world=bad. Why don't you just appreciate what is good instead of being bummed about the bad ?(God was much more eloquent than me, I just summed it up in my own words)."

From what I hear, we are all sad, bombarded, and confused. I think God is just calling us to be glad with the good, but we are bent on focusing on the bad. Maybe I am simplifying the problem-- Yes... I am. The problems in our lives are great-- but not as great as the poor woman on Oprah today who was stabbed over 50 times by her husband, awoke in the hospital to find out that he had killed their two children, received no warning from her husband that he would do such a thing, and who probably wished she would have died instead of lived, and you know what is sadder? I don't know if she knew the Lord. She must have though... I don't know how she would balance it out otherwise.

Dang, we wrap our lives around a "significant other" or lack thereof sometimes. Whoa, can they fail our expectations of delivering us a happy life. There is only one deliverer.

It seems Good and Bad are on a big balance scale. I think we spend a lot of our time jumping on the Bad side, trying to make it seem a lot worse than it is and trying to out jump God, who is pushing down on the good side, balancing things out. It's as though we enjoy despair? I wonder why? Really, our "bad" all added together is so minor compared to what Mike and the Edwards' might be witnessing in Africa.

Our world leaders met to discuss what to do about Africa. There was an article in the NYTimes Magazine about how even if we sunk a butt-load of money into Africa, that we would not be able to fix anything much because of inner-hatred and fighting amongst groups of people. Money cannot buy hope.

Only one thing gives hope, and we have it. Let's be joyous in that. What have we got to lose, really?

Psalm 13
For the director of music. A psalm of David.

1 How long, O LORD ? Will you forget me forever?
How long will you hide your face from me?

2 How long must I wrestle with my thoughts
and every day have sorrow in my heart?
How long will my enemy triumph over me?

3 Look on me and answer, O LORD my God.
Give light to my eyes, or I will sleep in death;

4 my enemy will say, "I have overcome him,"
and my foes will rejoice when I fall.

5 But I trust in your unfailing love;
my heart rejoices in your salvation.

6 I will sing to the LORD,
for he has been good to me.

Don't turn back to the pain-- there is no sense to it; there is no hope in it.

-boo

Hey all,

I forgot to really talk about my vacation to SC. I really don't feel like it now either, so just ask me sometime. We went to the beach and this cool aquarium. Here's some pics.

First a picture of my puppy, Colby, wishing you a happy belated independence day-- woot!



A big turtle...



Me, petting a sting ray thing...



Tara, looking at a big shark...



And that's about it for now.

-boo

Things are better, thanks to the Lord above:)

Some lyrics from Relient K (Be My Escape) that speak my innermost thoughts:

"I’ve given up on giving up slowly, I’m blending in so
You won’t even know me apart from this whole world that shares my fate
This one last bullet you mention is my one last shot at redemption
because I know to live you must give your life away
And I’ve been housing all this doubt and insecurity and
I’ve been locked inside that house all the while You hold the key
And I’ve been dying to get out and that might be the death of me
And even though, there’s no way in knowing where to go, promise I’m going because
I gotta get outta here
I’m stuck inside this rut that I fell into by mistake
I gotta get outta here
And I’m begging You, I’m begging You, I’m begging You to be my escape.

I’m giving up on doing this alone now
Cause I’ve failed and I’m ready to be shown how
He’s told me the way and I’m trying to get there
And this life sentence that I’m serving
I admit that I’m every bit deserving
But the beauty of grace is that it makes life not fair

Cause I’ve been housing all this doubt and insecurity and
I’ve been locked inside that house all the while You hold the key
And I’ve been dying to get out and that might be the death of me
And even though, there’s no way in knowing where to go, promise I’m going because
I gotta get outta here
Cause I’m afraid that this complacency is something I can’t shake
I gotta get outta here
And I’m begging You, I’m begging You, I’m begging You to be my escape.

I am a hostage to my own humanity
Self detained and forced to live in this mess I’ve made
And all I’m asking is for You to do what You can with me
But I can’t ask You to give what You already gave

Cause I’ve been housing all this doubt and insecurity and
I’ve been locked inside that house all the while you hold the key
And I’ve been dying to get out and that might be the death of me
And even though, there’s no way in knowing where to go, promise I’m going because
I’ve gotta get outta here
I’m stuck inside this rut that I fell into by mistake
I’ve gotta get outta here
And I’m begging You, I’m begging You, I’m begging
You to be my escape.

I fought You for so long
I should have let You in
Oh how we regret those things we do
And all I was trying to do was save my own skin
But so were You

So were You"

I am headed to BG this afternoon-- call if you want to do something. I will be with Tess, of course:)

More words later.

-boo

Hey all,

I thought you might like to see some pics of my trip to NYC. These are a little outdated (Jan.). We should all go to NYC sometime?

Van Gogh's A Starry Night!!! Whaa!! (I got in trouble for taking this picture, so love it, dang it)



Studying in Borders on the last day (these won't be in chronological order)-- we were tuckered out. This is my friend Sarah and I.



Me in front of MTV studios. I think this is exciting because I grew up in front of MTV. I almost cried the first time I saw this place like I did when I was ten and visited Nickelodeon Studios.



This is Laren and I eating chocolate covered strawberries in Greenwich Village. We are at an awesome street fair. I bought the hat I am wearing in the picture there.



Tess, here's one for the kissing scrapbook. I kissed this bunny in front of the MOMA (Modern Museum of Art- I just defeated the purpose of the abbreviation- from now on MOMA) and in front of a lot of NYC ppl and tourists.



Bobbie Jo and I in Central Park on a big rock.



And that's it for now.

-boo

[[Communication and Reciprocity]]

Tonight I found myself wondering why it is I hate the telephone. I owe Tess a phone call, I owe Becca a phone call, Kara, I'm sure, wouldn't mind a phone call. But I hate the phone. The phone is so phoney. I can't read a face over the phone. When you call someone, the silence is unacceptable-- a void that needs filled, but when you are in person, you can be as silent as you want at times. I always talk more with people who I am physically around-- I think everyone tends to do that. That is, unless they are obsessed with a person, as in a "fasinating new thing," as in a new relationship with a significant other. Other than that, I think we relate better when we can talk in person. I can even talk better online than on the phone.

I wonder why that is? I think that maybe you know more about the other person when you are talking online versus the phone. You don't know if they are taking a crap, if they are mouthing words to the other person (people) in the room, if you are on speaker phone, if they are paying attention to you, if they care about what you are saying... For some reason, you can know all those things, it seems, if you are talking to someone online, or especially in person. I get so distracted on the phone. My Mom has me do dishes, my family listens to half the conversation... I can't go outside-- I am allergic and the neighbors can then here the conversation I am having with my friends. Grrr.... I don't get it. I can't bring myself to call anyone.

I feel bad because Becca is hurt and is assuming the worst from her hurting. I do that too when I am hurt. I don't hate anyone because I don't call them up-- I don't not care about you and don't not want to talk to you. I just don't like phones. And when you haven't talked to someone in awhile, there's always the catching up to do which takes 5 minutes in person and seems to take forever on the phone. When you are on the phone you just sit and talk. When you are with someone you can be doing things-- walking, going somewhere, eating... just something.

I feel bad not being able to put people into my schedule-- but that is what I hate most about phone calls. You do have to put it in your schedule. It's like a huge statement that the person is no longer a part of your life and has to be now squeezed in. When I am at home, it is a different life. A life of 12 hour a day work days, coming home, helping to make dinner, eating, doing dishes, talking to my family for a few minutes, rollerblading, taking Colby on a walk, taking a shower, and going to bed. If I don't work 12 hours, there's Grandma's to visit, errands to run, and things to do for my family. I hate being at home for these reasons.

I love being at home for getting to spend time with my family, for getting to spend time with my puppy, for getting to spend time with my grandma's, for getting to blog more, for getting to make some sweet moola, for getting to read some good books (I need to write a blog about the latest book I just read).

The thing is, I don't know how to be close to people who are away from me. I am not the type to drop everything and sit and call someone. "uh huh, yep, uh huh, so what'd you do after that" When do you have a conversation like that in person? You don't! You can't be silly over the phone-- you can't "hang-out" over the phone. To be honest, I forget about my other lives when I am consumed by a different one.

There's some friendship quote about true friends knowing their friendship is strong even when they are apart-- like being able to know that when they see each other the next time, that they will be about to have fun together just like they did when they were last with each other. I guess that is my mantra.

Becca, I am sorry if you expect more reciprocity from me. I shouldn't have told you I would call, when I know I am not good at calling. Not that I won't talk on the phone should anyone call, it's just that I don't often think of calling people and I honestly kinda dread it. I DON'T DREAD talking to my friends-- I just dread the time spent in sitting in the chair, not doing anything, but just sitting there.

The reason I like blogs so much is because they efficiently take care of wasted time in conversation, in my opinion. You can read about what people are doing, how they are feeling, what they are learning, etc., so you don't have to spend so much time conversing about the surface stuff and really dig deep into conversation when you are with each other, or you can actually do stuff together.

Becca, if you want to talk on the phone. Let's do it. I am sorry I haven't been a better friend. It's not your fault that my favored form of communication is not an option for our friendship. Admittedly, I am not a very giving friend, especiallly not right now. It is something that I need to work on. Maybe I will force myself into a schedule. We should have a group phone call or something. I don't know if that is possible.

It's just that a hour per close friend is about 4-5 hours a week, and when I only get one hour of free time a night, usually spent with the Lord or helping my sister with a project, it is hard for me to afford that hour. What takes a hour on phone takes 5 minutes on email or in person. What an insensitive efficiency argument.

What I am saying is that I would rather hang out with all of you and when we aren't hanging out, why don't we just trust the fact that we can catch up and hang out when we get back together. Why are there assumptions that so and so hates so and so because there hasn't been communication--- UGH... see, even just now my Mom is yelling for me to come upstairs and help her. I can't help everyone and I can't be everyone's genie. I can try to fulfill everyone's expectations, but dang-- I am tired of it. That is where I stumble is when I try to please men all the time. I forget what God wants of me-- why do people expect so much of me or why do I assume they do.

Leslie serves a purpose for you, Becca. I don't know if we can all do that or if we were all meant to. If you wanted to talk on the phone with me, just call me. Tess knows and I don't think she minds the way I am. She knows that if she wants to talk to me, that she will probably have to call. It's not that I don't love Tess, or that I don't want to talk to her, it's just that I would rather drive up to BG and see Tess and hang out at Grounds and I would probably think of doing that before I would think of calling her up on the phone. If you really want me to call you, I can. I am just saying that it is a huge weakness of mine to remember to do such things. I was the world's worst penpal and I am probably the world's worst phone caller.

Reciprocity is one of the powers of influence that are in this book we read for IMPACT called Influence. The author suggests that we beware the powers of reciprocity because it influences us to do things that are not desireable. One should find other reasons why s/he should do something and not just do something because someone else did it for them. In short, I should not necessarily feel like I should call someone if they called me. Think of all the telemarketers I owe a phone call. If I were to call someone, the motivation should be that I want to call that person, or that the person needs me to call them. Becca, I did not know that you had that need until you blogged so.

Well, that's enough about annoyances. If any of you all are upset about something that involves me, just come on over and we'll talk about it, or if you want, you can call me. The public forum might not be the best place for these conversations, but then again, we can all learn from each other. I think this is one of those things I appreciate about men, they don't need to call each other to know that they still care about each other. I guess I don't need the reminder either, but maybe I do, just in other ways.

[[Vacation]]

I am leaving for vacation to Myrtle Beach, SC in a few days. I am really excited because I am going to see a cousin I haven't seen since I was about 12. She was one of my best friends. I talked to her on the phone the other day and it was just like I said before-- even though we haven't seen each other for about ten years and have only talked to her a couple times through letters since then, everything was just as we had left it. We were able to talk and get along and everything. Anyway, if you don't hear from me for awhile, it's not because of lack of care, but because I am on vacation.

[[My Mom is Nuts]]

I have been fighting with my mom like crazy, so pray for me there. She expects me to be her servant all the time. And I don't mind doing things for her, but I hate pissing off my friends. My phone was just ringing awhile ago (probably Tess) and I wasn't allowed to answer it because I had to take some suitcases out to the motorhome. My sister is never here because of the way my Mom is. She is painting with a friend right now and my Dad is eating ice cream and watching TV. He is the only one that doesn't have to answer to my Mom. That usually leaves me to do whatever she wants me to. We got in the biggest fight the other day about my sister and I sharing clothes. My sister "borrows" my clothes and other stuff (art supplies, computer, iPod, etc) all of the time without asking. I finally got tired of just saying, "Hey Tara, isn't that my shirt? Ask next time you want to wear something." So I got mad at her the other day when she cut the sleaves off of one of my t-shirts and wore it to paint in. She said that my Mom gave her permission (something she would never give me permission to do to my sister's clothes), and I told her she couldn't go in my room for a week and couldn't borrow a single thing. Well, my Mom got all mad at me and went ballistic-- it makes her mad because she can yell and swear all she wants and I usually keep my cool. I just try to reason with her and tell her that it is not fair that Tara can just use my stuff anytime she wants without asking, but I cannot do the same. Well, to make a longer story shorter, my Mom yelled at me till tears formed, and I got the crap out of the house for awhile. I can't wait until I have a job and some money to go somewhere, get an apt., and move away. I am tired and again, lonely. (Don't stop reading my blog if it is too depressing-- I am not all that depressed and will get lighter here somewhere)

[[Move Away?]]

Is everyone still going to Austin? Sorry, Tess. I cannot imagine myself in Austin. I've been thinking about it, and praying about it. I still don't know where I am going. Maybe God will open up my heart to the biggest red state, with the most capital punishment cases, etc.-- It just seems like the least compassionate and the hottest place one could go in the country. I really like sweaters.

[[The DaVinci Code]]

I just read this book and it was awesome. My Grandma asked me to read it and talk about it with her so I decided to since I can't afford to buy any books right now. It is amazing and I suggest it for the Christians out there. I want to research some of the "facts" in the book and what they mean to the way I see and worship God. The "facts" seem to make Jesus even more human that we believe-- but who knows. I would love to discuss it with you guys. Maybe I will post some of the most amazing things I read about in this book.

[[Ann Arbor]]

A couple of weekends ago, I traveled to BG to visit some friends. It was a great time. I was struggling with some depressive stuff for some reason. I am super lonely here lately, and I am trying to fight that with the best thing I know how-- by strengthening my relationship with God. But it was so good to hang out with everyone at Joel's house. After Joel's BBQ we went back to Roo's room and watched TMNT-- such a classic. Then, the next morning, Mike and Tess surprised me with a trip to Ann Arbor. We did all of the normal Ann Arbor things and ate at a Mongolian BBQ. Good stuff. Thanks Mike and Tess. I don't think I ever told you of my appreciation. Thanks Joel, for the BBQ. I will probably come to visit in a couple of weekends-- when I get back from Myrtle Beach.
Hey, Mike, can you send me some of those Ann Arbor pics? Is there anyway to do it through IM or something not my email. Kara loaded my inbox 5 times with pics and I don't think the inbox could take any more pics.

[[Nearing the End]]

Okay, I am probably going to go now. My Mom keeps yelling at me about something new, but I keep drowning her out. I am going to get it if I don't go. This might be one of my longest blogs ever. Hope you're not bored. Now you are all updated so we can talk about something different should I call you or you decide to call me.

3 more days of work till vacation-- woo hoo,

boo

http://www.nytimes.com/2005/05/31/opinion/31 kristof.html?

This is a wonderful piece put together by nicholas kristof. can you believe that ppl write letters like the one at the top of the article-- the one his response is direct towards?

I have a lot on my mind right now. We'll see how much of it I get out on here. Some of it should probably stay inside my head, while the rest should have been dumped out to my friends long ago. Right now I am about as emo as a holly-boo can get, but then again, I am in the quiet of my room. I am struggling with being real in front of even, my very best friends. I am very good at hiding my emotion and, am now realizing, hiding my "true" mood, feelings, etc. I kind of mentioned loneliness in my last post on the blog-- well, that is one demon that has been ever-present in my life since earlier this year. I've been reading Job and am realizing that sometimes God throws us some things now and again. I've have always been one to avoid things that would hinder my relationship with God. I remember thinking, as a young Christian, "dang, this Christianity thing will be easy. All I need to do is avoid bad things." I am finding out though, that those "bad things" have a way of getting past my avoidances. It's easier than I thought to fall into a lifestyle where God isn't present in every action-- this has been my school year this year. It is easier than I thought to not be real to your friends so they can't help you and lose interest in helping you-- my year. It is easier than I thought to trust humans to define your Christian walk and then realize that they are human-- this was the end of my "extreme participation in an religious group phase." It is easier than I thought to fall in love, or think you've fallen in love and then realize that you've been duped by a human. The pathway down is simple-- following humans instead of God, all the while, thinking you are doing something Godly. So after all of the realizations, the wounds are still here. Another misconception I had about being a Christian was that if you messed up, all you had to do was turn around and God was right there. Well, he's right there all right, but I am nearly blind with nearsightedness. He is a huge blur and my muscles for walking back to him have been weakened by their lack of use. So the good news is that I know he is still there- the bad news is that it is a struggle to get back. Especially with no support system, with this pervasive loneliness, with no direction for the future. I am one drained boo right now-- drained of hope and excitement-- two characteristics that I enjoyed possessing at one point. Even in the midst of friends last weekend, I found myself in a deep sadness as I drove home. I couldn't find that deep sense of joy that I usually experience when I fellowship with friends. I could't stop feeling lonely in a room full of people, or even with two of my best friends. It's amazing what a couple heartbreaks (yes, boys, but also things like 5.19, seeing friends go through major dispair, and loving non-Christians and then realizing their fate-- all heartbreaks in their own right) and a year of busyness can do to an energetic and optimistic person. To end this train of thought, here is a poem that is personal, but appropriate to share now, I think. Tess urged me earlier to share my poetry from my creative writing class. The class and prof found my work to be good-- but things like art and poetry are fueled by personal joy and sorrow and therefore, aren't always in abundance. I have felt both joy and sorrow flow through a paintbrush, and it flows so much more readily when those things are abundant in one's life. The same goes with words and poetry. This is just one of those poems.

My Exaggerations of What is Mostly Not Exaggerated

“nevermind, i don't love you
i haven't loved you for some time
what is love anyway?

you see, i am drawn to her
her and her keggers, blond hair, and big...
but i think you are beautiful
i am still attracted to you physically"

(apparently not in any other way—
inane omission on his part)

"you and all the others that look like her
you are the outlier
outliers eventually are eliminated
didn't you know that?"

"didn't
you
think
about
the odds
about statistics,
economic thought,
the costs and benefits
the odds were against our
being together from the start
reason says...”

reason says a lot of things
i am sensible and i see nothing

he forgets about degrees of intensity
reason weighs on a heart
much less than love
love is more
persuasive
as its
degree
is immeasurable

Another thing that is bothersome right now is that I have figured out that I often seek pleasure in pleasing others and not God because I love the instant gradification I receive from someone when they give me a thumbs up. I realized this today when: I stayed over today at work (which, if you didn't know, keeps me working from 7am-7pm), and I was a "body" which meant that the foremen on second shift could put me anywhere they wanted to. Well, they had me clean up around the place-- one of my least favorite jobs because it makes the time go so slowly. Well, I decided to go and get our big sweeper that you drive around. It is about as big as a forktruck and you cruise it around and you sweep. So, I was kind of stupid and drove it right through a really really messy part of the plant with really big pieces of brass all over the floor. The sweeper drug all of the debris out into the plant, and before I woke up from my daydream, I realized that I had REALLY made a mess of the place. So, I turned around and parked my sweeper (almost in tears), and started hand sweeping (because there were little brass rods poking out from under the sweeper that I would have to drag out, I couldn't really use it at the time). Just as I picked up a broom, the second shift foreman comes over and tells me, "Holly, you drug brass all the way out from casting into the factory. If you are going to clean casting- clean casting, if you are going to clean the factory- clean the factory; but you cannot do both! You have made a huge mess." "Yes, I know. I am sorry. I am cleaning it up right now. I drive through that way all the time and it has never been a problem (the casting people were the ones with the huge mess, btw)" "Well, you need to remember, from now on not to go through there. You've made this huge mess. You are going to need to clean all this up." "I know, I am sorry." *foreman storms off shaking head- literally* "Just keep sweeping sweeping sweeping" I sang to myself to hold back tears. Did he think I was an idiot. I realized what I had done and was cleaning it up. Gosh. Why did he have to keep yelling at me (he probably wasn't really yelling). Oh no, now the foremans are all going to think I am an idiot-- dang, I've worked so hard to be the best college student here and now I've ruined it. So then I proceeded to the bathroom (picture the smallest gas station bathroom you've been in-- dingy walls-- greasy floors-- clean toliet though--) This bathrooom is a one seater, and as depressing as it is, it is my safe-haven in the factory. What makes it so glorious is that it has a lock and no one ever uses the bathroom-- it is remote-- and I can go into it all by myself and let loose (the tears-- not other things) and talk to God, which is exactly what I did at that moment, earlier tonight. Through my hysterical fit (another nice thing about the bathroom is that it is right in between two machines-- no one can hear a thing coming from the bathroom), I realize through prayer and tears that I give too much creedence to others' opinions of me. I have been really depressed lately, I think, because there is no one to notice when I do something really grand, and to praise me justly. I am exaggerating, of course. But for my toddler years, I lived to please my parents-- while in school, I lived to please my teachers-- while in college, I found professors to please. Of course, the meta-person I wanted to please was God-- but in the day to day, I find other people to please. At the factory, it is the foremen and the people I work with that I wish to please. When I fail, I fall into a deep sadness and get angry. When I have failed to please friends, parents, professors, and boyfriends, these things have sprialed me farther and farther away from the one being I wish to please the most-- and that is God. So my encouragement to you and myself is to not get caught up in what others want and need from you-- those things are secondary (at most).

Okay-- well, that was cathartic. I am tired now and I sleep now.

-boo

So it's been awhile again since my last blog, but I do not feel so bad seeing as though some of my friends haven't blogged in a month or so. I haven't really been up to much. I have been in some creative moods lately, but I've been working like crazy at a factory here at home, so the creative flow has been stiffled. The most I've done is to create this blog header.

I have to work 1st shift this year since that is the shift my Dad is on. In previous summers I have worked 3rd shift with him, but he finally got enough senority to be on 1st, so there I am too. The people are old, hurting with joint pain, and can be a bit crabby sometimes, so finding good conversation is tough. Summers tend to be lonely for me, but the comfort of money in my bank account is an incentive for enduring the loneliness.

The work isn't too bad though. Many of you might be surprised to see me decked out in all of my safety gear (hard hat, safety glasses, uniform, and steel toed boots) and crusin around in some heavy machinery, but it is an interesting experience to say the least.

I am such a nerd... my highest form of entertainment right now is watching American Idol with my family. I think I need to go to BG this weekend for something a little more... me. Eh, I have nothing interesting to write about right now. I am going to go and finish, "Catcher in the Rye" and go to bed.

ttyl,
boo

...but i stumbled upon this in my research:

"Evolutionary Hymn"
 
Lead us, Evolution, lead us
Up the future's endless stair;
Chop us, change us, prod us, weed us.
For stagnation is despair:
Groping, guessing, yet progressing,
Lead us nobody knows where.

Wrong or justice, joy or sorrow,
In the present what are they
while there's always jam-tomorrow,
While we tread the onward way?
Never knowing where we're going,
We can never go astray.

To whatever variation
Our posterity may turn
Hairy, squashy, or crustacean,
Bulbous-eyed or square of stern,
Tusked or toothless, mild or ruthless,
Towards that unknown god we yearn.

Ask not if it's god or devil,
Brethren, lest your words imply
Static norms of good and evil
(As in Plato) throned on high;
Such scholastic, inelastic,
Abstract yardsticks we deny.

Far too long have sages vainly
Glossed great Nature's simple text;
He who runs can read it plainly,
'Goodness = what comes next.'
By evolving, Life is solving
All the questions we perplexed.

Oh then! Value means survival-
Value. If our progeny
Spreads and spawns and licks each rival,
That will prove its deity
(Far from pleasant, by our present,
Standards, though it may well be).

-C.S. Lewis

http://www.poemhunter.com/c-s-lewis/poet-34962/ " title="http://www.poemhunter.com/c-s-lewis/poet-34962/ " target="_blank"http://www.poemhunter.com/c-s...

(who knew Lewis was a poet too?)

sup?

i have been crazy-busy lately with school stuff and am procrastinating as we speak. also, my head has been in the clouds- or so they say. ever get in the mood where you want to create something, but have loaded your plate with other things so there is no outlet?-- that is my place right now. so i've just been consuming others' creations.

-sufjan-- yeah-- wow

-ben folds-- where did he come from-- i just started really listening to his stuff last night and found it to be amazing "asent of stan" being my favorite right now

-michael eds-- africa, music, brother, doubt you now the goodness of the rain

-ani difranco-- i am not as into her musical style as much as her lyrics-- she is a bleeding hearted poet

"Animal"

More and more there is this animal
Looking out through my eyes
At all the traffic on the road to nowhere
At all the shiny stuff around to buy
At all the wires in the air
At all the people shopping
For the same blank stare
At america the drastic
That isolated geographic
That's become infested with millionaires

When you grow up surrounded
By willful ignorance
You have to believe
Mercy has its own country
And that it's round and borderless
And then you have to grow wings
And rise above it all
Like there
Where that hawk is circling
Above that strip mall

More and more there is this animal
Looking out through my eyes
Seeing that animals only take from this world
What they need to survive
But she is prowling through all the religions of men
Seeing that time and time and time again
Their gods have made them
Special and above
Nature's law
And the respect thereof

And I think when you grow up surrounded
By willful ignorance
You have to believe that mercy has its own country
And that it's round and borderless
And then you just grow wings
And rise above it all
Like there where that hawk is circling
Above that strip mall

Ask any eco-system
Harm here is harm there
And there and there
And aggression begets aggression
It's a very simple lesson
That long preceded any king of heaven
And there's this brutal imperial power
That my passport says I represent
But it will never represent where my heart lives
Only vaguely where it went

Cuz I know when you grow up surrounded
By willful ignorance
You learn that mercy has its own country
And that it's round and borderless
And then you just grow wings
And rise above it all
Like there
Where that hawk is circling
Above that strip mall

Hey all,

This is my response to Joel's latest blog on the Terry Schiavo issue. Joel, I did not want to post this in your trackback in case you didn't want something this heated to occur on your blog. I do not mean to be disrespectful of your opinion. On the contrary, I am intrigued by it and am quite willing to be proven incorrect in my assumptions and assertions. However, I would ask that you would be respectful and fair in return. So here's my response:


Wow, Joel. Was the Schiavo issue that easy for you to determine the rightness and wrongness of? I hear ya, but what about the following? I was talking with Kara about what it must be like to be brain dead-- your soul is still alive... waiting to go somewhere, but everything else about you is dead. In Terry's case, her soul was in limbo, waiting to go to heaven? So that is one thing.

Hospice lets people die like that everyday. I used to volunteer with hospice in H.S.- it's sad, but should we fight for all those people too? I don't really think that's a slippery slope either. Why did we choose to pay attention to Terry Schiavo over all the others? And what about the people who decide not to have life support before their life is even threatened? They didn't put my mom on lifesupport before she died. To follow the logic of your argument would imply that such action is suicide? Since my Dad didn't force it once she became unconscious, was that patient assisted suicide?

Why are we so concerned with preserving life down here when we know there is so much more to be had later on? I'm not saying we should kill people (and I don't think that the doctors, government, or whomever killed Terry), but God didn't create the machine that prolongs life. Do you think that maybe we've taken it into our own hands, sometimes, to prolong the acting out of God's will for some people, by hooking them up to a life machine when it is medically certain that they will not awake?

Sorry for my "defacating mouth," but to call such opinions "godless, arrogant, faithless, heartless, and monstrous" I think is unfair. Especially when you falsely compare such a situation with tossing a child with down's sydrome into a meat hopper. If not for the prolonged use of man's machine, death would have occured long ago. But in the case of the child with Down's syndrome, no machine is needed for life to continue. Simply put, a false and malicious analogy.

Man is not meant to have the power to choose whether another man should live or die-- I think we know we've gone too far when we are faced with that decision. eg: murder, cloning, and when we are able to make a black and white decision to flip the switch to life on or off

I sometimes wonder if we have gone too far in the area of medicine? As soon as we know that one cannot, and will not ever survive without the machine, and will never be conscious, do you think that maybe we are playing God with our machine, just as we would be playing God with the petri dish were we to create a cloned human being?

Realize, Joel, that when you speak in the tone and with the vivacity that you did in your blog, that you close your mind and the conversation. Do you leave room that you may be wrong and that people aren't saying "they should have killed Helen Keller"?

Anyone can respond. I am open to criticism and conversation.

-Holly

Well, I just got back from another one of my travels. IMPACT went to NYC this weekend and it was great. I went to the Modern Museum of Art (and got yelled at by a security guard- the first time for- getting to close to the painting- the second time for- accidentily walking past the painting- and the third time for- taking a flash photo of the painting-opps- i didn't mean to do any of those things). I also went to Central Park, a street fair in Greenwich Village, Times Square, and some of the other major sites in NYC.

The city is so exciting, and yet I don't understand how people could live there. It is kinda smelly (in a bad way) and you would never want to drive around there because the traffic is horrible and the people all shout and give each other the finger as often as they feel the need (which is very often). I guess it is the variety of people and the excitement that drives one there.

Bobbie Jo and I went to the biggest church I have ever stepped into on Sunday. It is called the Times Square Church. The building is a transformed Broadway theatre (so it's huge) and the floor seats and the balcony seats were completely full when we got there. So we were directed to the "annex" where there are dozens of rooms (about as big as the union ballroom) with big screen TVs showing the sermon. All of these rooms are full to capacity. It was great! All of those believers all in one place. It was so uplifting to be in a place where there were so many people praising God. You could feel it here. The ppl were so diverse too.

Well, I have to skip off to class... There were other things I wanted to talk about, but no time now.

-boo

I have had some of the weirdest happenings happen to me in the last few weeks. It's all been good times in the end though:

Well, as most of you know, my car broke down a couple weeks ago on the way to Ann Arbor. Luckily my friends are kind enough to help me with my car:





And here is a picture of Tess' hand checking the dampness in the glove box. When I noticed there was no heat in the car, I called my Dad. He had us check a few things like the tension in the heater nobs, for dampness in the glovebox, and finally he had me check the temperature gauge- that is where the problem was. My car was about ready to overheat. Lucky for us that there was no dampness in the glovebox though. Thanks, Tess, for risking the dryness of your hand for the potential dampness of my glove box:



The car blew a head gasket and such things cost way too much to replace, so I financed a newer used car. Some red car that looks pretty cool.

Shifting gears: I just got back from sunny Las Vegas, NV. I went there for my spring break and stayed with Dr. Browne and Dr. Kubasek. Garrett came along as well. The drs. have the biggest yard with the most plants. I spent much of my break weeding around cacti (oww), digging holes for plants, building a mini mountain, and spreading gravel in the yard. Here's a picture of some of the work we did. We really didn't do a whole lot of what is in the picture- they love doing yard work. It's okay, but I would never have a yard this big. The picture shows about a fourth of the yard. You can see a bit of the mural Tess and I painted when we were both out there. It is on the wall on the right side of the photo, behind some plants:



I had a great time in Vegas. I even gambled a little. Dr. Browne taught me to play video poker and about the odds a bit. I won some sweet moola playing with them.

I saw a Cirque De Soleil show while I was there. If you don't know what a Cirque show is (I didn't before I went to one), it is a troupe of body contortionists/dancers/I don't know what. The shows are wholly elaborate with crazy, beautiful costumes, intense music, and a plot that usually doesn't make much sense. The shows are hard to describe, but they are one of the awesomest pieces of eye candy I've ever witnessed.

I also went to Death Valley. It is a beautiful time of year to go there, I guess. It was sunny and warm, and there were flowers everywhere:



My other crazy story happened at Death Valley. Garrett and I stopped at the lowest, hottest point (92 degrees while we were there, 120 in the summer) on the western hemisphere. It is several feet below sea level and is called, "Badwater."



The white stuff is salt left behind by old sea water.

Well, after we were done there, Garrett had to go to the bathroom and so I asked him for the keys to our rental car so I could start the air conditioning. I unlocked the drivers side door and started the car and turned on the air. I then walked around to get into my side and realized the door was locked. So I walked back around to the drivers' side and realized it was locked too.

I have never locked the keys in my car before and I decide to try in in the middle of the desert at the lowest, most hottest point on the western hemisphere. Garrett was a little perturbed and proceeded to hunt down a coat hanger. He bent it and then he and another guy wedged it between the glass and the rubbery stuff on the car window. They finallly hit one of the window buttons and we got in. It was a crazy thing to happen and I wondered for a moment if I was going to survive the desert. We did.

Here's a picture of me very happy to be at sea level again:



Oh, and one more thing: I thought this infographic on the Onion was hillarious:



So I had a great spring break... how was yours?

-boo

Scrabble Come-On Only Worth Four Points
(onion.com)

Oh, how I was so depressed when I heard that Sixpence None the Richer was through with making music. Something about Leigh Nash's vocals and the poetic/intellectual lyrics soothes my soul so much. Well, I have been introduced to a fine band who can fill my desire for such music.

Eisley is the first band I have REALLY clicked with in a long time- just musically. I confess that I haven't really listened to the lyrics yet. The music leaves me full right now.



Here's a brief intro:

A quintet featuring three sisters, their brother, and their best friend, Tyler, TX's Eisley formed in 1997 when the DuPree siblings -- guitarist Chauntelle, singer/guitarist Sherri, singer/keyboardist Stacy, and drummer Weston -- began playing with bassist Jon Wilson. Originally called the Towheads, the band began playing local gigs the following year, when Stacy was just eight years old. Over the next five years, the band wrote and played, expanding their touring area to the Dallas-Fort Worth region and ultimately winning a 2003 Best New Act Award from the Dallas Observer. A few months later, the group released their debut EP, Laughing City, on the indie imprint Record Collection, and toured that spring and summer with Coldplay and Ron Sexsmith. The Marvelous Things EP arrived later in 2003, and early in 2005, their first full-length, Room Noises, arrived. ~ Heather Phares, All Music Guide

Here's a link to a longer intro:

http://www.mtv.com/news/yhif/eisley/" title="http://www.mtv.com/news/yhif/eisley/" target="_blank"http://www.mtv.com/news/yhif/...

My favorite songs, right now, are: Telescope Eyes, Trolley Wood, and Brightly Wound

www.eisley.com



P.S. Their name comes from a space port in Star Wars called Moss Eisley

P.S.S. I just blogged this morning (below) in case you missed it.

"When I woke up this morning, I never thought that I wouldn't be in Ann Arbor, that I would know about blown gaskets, that I would have met a tow truck driver named Dwane, that I would have taken a vegetarian to Cabellas, and that I would be shopping with you for cars." -a comment I made to Tags as I was sitting in a Pontiac Sunfire.

Yeah, so those of you not there, I will tell you the story of my crazy day yesterday. Yesterday was a beautiful day to go to Ann Arbor- the members of Sigma Tau Delta decided to make this our first event as a group. We took two cars- mine being one of them. Between the sweet tunes playing out of my iPod and out of my big speaker, Tess and I would complain about the frigidness inside my car. For some bizarre reason, my car's heat was not working. Finally, I decided to call my Dad:

"Hey Dad. Do heaters in cars break, because I think mine might be broken."

"Well, sometimes a belt in the nobbs might break. Have your passenger check the resistance in the nobbs."

"Tess, turn the nobbs on the heater really slow. Do you get much resistance."

With an annoyed and confused look, Tess responds, "No, and it's still blowing out cold air."

"Well, Holly, what does your temperature gauge read?"

"Oh, it just reads... crap! it is almost in the red."

"Pull over NOW!"

"What?! Dad, can't I wait till I get to an exit?"

"Well, is it in the red yet?"

"No, not yet."

"Pull of at the next exit."

"Tess, call somebody and tell them we have to pull off on the next exit."

So we pull off at the exit past Dundee to let my car cool down. As I was on the phone with my Dad, Ben, Mike, and another Mike helped to fix the car. Ben just happened to have the green slimer kool-aid liquid that needed to go in my empty coolant tank. We filled 'er up and followed my Dad's orders to go back an exit to Cabellas where a tow truck would meet my car and me there.

After touring the "world's most outfitter" (what does that mean?), and the largest collection of stuffed animals (not the cute, fake kind) and the largest collection of hunters, all of STD left in Ben's car except me and Dan.

Dan and I got very expensive Tuna sandwhiches (the only kind of meat that Dan can eat- pretty much everything had meat in it- and wierd meat too- ostrich, bear, bison). We also got tons of calls from my parents. The tow truck was on the way.

We met Dwane in the front of Cabellas and he let us ride in his tow truck to my car (tow trucks are pretty sweet rides). He was about read to hook 'er up, but I told him to wait because nothing was leaking. He popped the hood to look at the insides of my car. When he checked the oil, he noticed that the dip-stick was covered in liquid about 6 inches up. He said that the coolant was probably leaking into the motor.

Just then my parents found us and my Dad told him to "hook 'er up." I forgot my car pass (at the time I thought I was going to use my Grandma's car for the week I didn't have a car), so I got to climb up on the tow truck to get it out- yes!

From there, we had Dwane follow us to Maumee- to Ed Schmidt's Chevrolet. Dan and I perused the Hummers while my Dad talked with the people. My Dad came out and told me to start looking at used cars on the lot because I might need a new one.

I was really confused- my car was just missing some slimer fluid.

Well, it turns out I blew a gasket (ha- so that's where that phrase came from) and all the slimer fluid had gotten into my motor and the motor would have caught on fire if we had drove much more. It is a weird thing that Tess and I got fed up with the cold right before my motor was about to ignite. Some people call these moments fortunate coincidences- I call them divine intervention.

Anyway, the repairs of my car will probably cost half of what the car is worth (which is all of my savings- grr). So my Dad says, "why don't you think about getting a new used car." So Dan and I checked out some new used (an oxymoron that makes complete sense) cars and then we left because they weren't going to give me anything for my old car.

Bummer.

So, I am looking for a ride to Maumee Tuesday or Thursday from 2:30-5:00?:)

Well, after all that. We came back to BG, we dropped Dan off, and my parents took me to El Zarrape (mmm... that was good and cheap. If anyone ever wants to get some Mexican food there, I am in)

Later, after I got over the shock of not having any money again, I went to a play with some IMPACTers about Paul Robeson. Look this dude up. He was a really influential guy for African American rights in America, but he has been erased (or so it seems) out of history books because of his association (or assumed association) with the Communist party.

Well, time for Church.

ttyl,

boo

Hey Ya'll,

I have had a fantabulous time since I last blogged. I got back from Chicago last night at 1:00 am (this morning). I had a lot of fun shopping on Uncle Sam's money (income tax return- woo hoo), eating Indian food, going to the Art Institute of Chicago, and seeing some really cool plays.

Bobbie Jo and I hung out a lot this weekend and had a great time shopping in all of the expensive stores. We actually found some cheaper places to shop, which was really nice in comparison to window shopping Tiffany's or something. I got to see the mac mini in person at the Apple Store on Michigan Ave. They didn't have a shuffle out though, so I didn't get to play with that.

The art institute was amazing and I would recommend it to anyone. Here's just some of what I saw:



This is a painting by Van Gogh- it is a self-portrait. His paintings are especially cool to see up close because he gunks the paint on the canvas.



Dots- this painting is made up of a bunch of little dots. You get up close to this one and you can hardly tell what it is because Seurat uses a technique called pointilism or stipiling.



This painting is by Andy Warhol and is HUGE. It is at least 15 feet by 15 feet.



The art institute had a bunch of work from one of my favorite artists, Rene Magritte. This painting is called "Time Transfixed." Magritte is well read and a huge fan of Michel Foucault. His paintings are embedded in theory. In this painting Foucault is asking the question, how does your thinking change when your assumptions about time and space are disrupted?

The plays in Chicago were also thought provoking. My favorite play was "The Love Song of J. Robert Oppenheimer"- the creator of the atomic bomb. The play questions the responsiblity of the scientist. If we know what will be done with our creation, how are we to be held responsible for the affect? Oppenheimer was just playing with science and it just so happened, as a result, Hiroshima and Nagasaki were obliderated. Is he responsible?

Besides the ideas in the play, I loved the references to one of my favorite poems, "The Love Song of J. Alfred Prufrock" by T.S. Eliot. There is a character in the play named "Lilith." In Hebrew mythology she is considered to be a demon. She was the first wife God gave Adam, but she "wouldn't lie down." For her disobedience, she became a demon and God created Eve. I had never heard about Lilith in the Bible. The name means "in the darkness" and she is said to be the mother of darkness. I wonder if she is the figure in the "Passion of the Christ"- the one holding the baby and who follows Jesus around? Anyone else heard of Lilith? I also wonder if she is a symbol for feminists? eg. The Lilith Fair?

Well, that is it about the weekend- now for last week...

Becca was in town!!! Whoa! She surprised me on Thursday, just as I was about to lay down and take a long nap. O-well. I would have rather hung out with Becca any day. She came to my door and I just opened it and was like, "Hey Becca... ... ... what are you doing here?!" It was wierd. I couldn't get used to her being in the room- something like what Freud would call the uncanny:)

We went to Grounds and talked a long time- sat at the same table we had our first d-time-- boo hoo--- It was so good to see her. We then went to Leslie and Kari's place and later we went out to eat at Panera. We came back to my room and watched That 70s Show for awhile and crocheted, and then I had to go to bed, so she left. Here and gone- oh so fast.

Last week I was in the school all week. It was a good time and I think I am going to have a lot of fun when I get to teach. I made a Napoleon Dynamite bulletin board that the H.S. kiddies loved.

Well, I am tired of typing and I should do some work on this lovely day off:)

ttyl,

boo

Following in the footsteps of the Great Yo, I am going to see how well I do on predicting the winners of the Grammy's. Here goes:

RECORD OF THE YEAR
(Award to the Artist and to the Producer(s), Recording Engineer(s) and/or Mixer(s), if other than the artist.)

* Let's Get It Started
The Black Eyed Peas

* Here We Go Again
Ray Charles & Norah Jones

* American Idiot
Green Day
Billie Joe Armstrong, Rob Cavallo, Mike Dirnt & Tré Cool

* Heaven
Los Lonely Boys

* YEAH!
USHER FEATURING LIL JON & LUDACRIS

While I think that "Heaven" will be a tight contender, Usher is definately superb. Norah and Ray might have a chance since Ray died and he might get a sympathy vote... but again... Usher is superb.

ALBUM OF THE YEAR
(Award to the Artist(s) and to the Album Producer(s), Recording Engineer(s)/Mixer(s) & Mastering Engineer(s), if other than the artist.)

* Genius Loves Company
Ray Charles & Various Artists

* American Idiot
Green Day
Billie Joe Armstrong, Rob Cavallo, Mike Dirnt & Tré Cool

* The Diary Of Alicia Keys
Alicia Keys

* CONFESSIONS
USHER

* The College Dropout
Kanye West

I will be ticked if Ray Charles gets any of these. Usher has my vote again. Alicia should be a contender, but Usher has rocked the charts for the past year.

SONG OF THE YEAR
(A Songwriter(s) Award. A song is eligible if it was first released or if it first achieved prominence during the Eligibility Year. (Artist names appear in parenthesis.) Singles or Tracks only.)

* Daughters
John Mayer, songwriter (John Mayer)
Track from: Heavier Things

* IF I AIN'T GOT YOU
ALICIA KEYS, SONGWRITER (ALICIA KEYS)
TRACK FROM: THE DIARY OF ALICIA KEYS

* Jesus Walks
Miri Ben Ari, C. Smith & Kanye West, songwriters (Kanye West)
Track from: The College Dropout

* Live Like You Were Dying
Tim Nichols & Craig Wiseman, songwriters (Tim McGraw)
Track from: Live Like You Were Dying

* The Reason
Daniel Estrin & Douglas Robb, songwriters (Hoobastank)
Track from: The Reason

Awesome song... she should win it. John Mayer is popular though, and this song is cute... who knows? Hoobastank might have a chance... no, it's Alicia all the way.

BEST NEW ARTIST
(For a new artist who releases, during the Eligibility Year, the first recording which establishes the public identity of that artist.)

* Los Lonely Boys

* Maroon5

* Joss Stone

* KANYE WEST

* Gretchen Wilson

My personal vote would go for Maroon 5; however, Kanye West has been all over the news, so I think he'll win it. Maybe Gretchen will get the Country sympathy vote though:)-- "I leave my Christmas lights on the front porch all year long, and I know every word to every Charlie Daniels song"... "Victoria's secret... yeah that stuff's real nice... but I can find the same damn thing on a Walmart shelf, half price."

BEST FEMALE POP VOCAL PERFORMANCE
(For a solo vocal performance. Singles or Tracks only.)

* Oceania
Björk
Track from: Medulla
[Elektra/Atlantic]

* The First Cut Is The Deepest
Sheryl Crow
Track from: The Very Best Of Sheryl Crow
[A&M Records]

* SUNRISE
NORAH JONES
TRACK FROM: FEELS LIKE HOME
[BLUE NOTE RECORDS]

* What You Waiting For?
Gwen Stefani
[Interscope Records]

* You Had Me
Joss Stone
[S-Curve Records]

Norah Jones has to get something for that wonderful album- this song is superb.

BEST MALE POP VOCAL PERFORMANCE
(For a solo vocal performance. Singles or Tracks only.)

* Let's Misbehave
Elvis Costello
Track from: De-lovely - Music From The Motion Picture (Various Artists)
[Columbia]

* YOU RAISE ME UP
JOSH GROBAN
TRACK FROM: CLOSER
[143/REPRISE]

* Daughters
John Mayer
Track from: Heavier Things
[Aware Records/Columbia]

* Cinnamon Girl
Prince
Track from: Musicology
[Columbia Records/NPG Records]

* Love's Divine
Seal
Track from: Seal IV
[Warner Bros.]

Josh Groban wins by voice alone- no contest.

BEST POP PERFORMANCE BY A DUO OR GROUP WITH VOCAL
(For established duos or groups, with vocals. Singles or Tracks only.)

* My Immortal
Evanescence
Track from: Fallen
[Wind-up Records, LLC]

* The Reason
Hoobastank
Track from: The Reason
[Island Records]

* HEAVEN
LOS LONELY BOYS
TRACK FROM: LOS LONELY BOYS
[OR MUSIC/EPIC RECORDS]

* She Will Be Loved
Maroon5
Track from: Songs About Jane
[Octone/J]

* It's My Life
No Doubt
Track from: The Singles 1992-2003
[Interscope Records]

Oh... this one is tough... My personal vote would be for Evanesence; however, the "Heaven" song was big with all age groups, was catchy, and was always on the radio. I dunno. I hope Evanesence wins this one.

BEST POP VOCAL ALBUM
(For albums containing 51% or more playing time of VOCAL tracks.)

* Genius Loves Company
Ray Charles & Various Artists
[Concord Records/Hear Music]

* Feels Like Home
Norah Jones
[Blue Note Records]

* AFTERGLOW
SARAH MCLACHLAN
[ARISTA RECORDS]

* Mind, Body & Soul
Joss Stone
[S-Curve Records]

* Brian Wilson Presents Smile
Brian Wilson
[Nonesuch Records]

After a girl-fight, Sarah McLachlan comes out on top of Norah. Yeah!

Well, that's all I have time for (my dinner is ready)... I think these are the most important anyway.

ttyl,

boo

Sagittarius: (Nov. 22—Dec. 21)
Unfortunately for you, the Bible addresses the fact that there is a time to live and a time to die, but it's vague on the subject of zombies.

-and on that note, I am off to Iowa in a few hours- bah humbug.

-boo